My Rights…..


I don’t know where to put this so I will just put this here.

© Melissa Pasek and, 2010 to present.

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I Pray this makes it’s point.



bridge kids

It feels like my whole life I have been “the connector”, “the hinge”, or the “bridge” between everyone. When I was little it was between my grandfather and my brothers or my paternal family and my maternal family.  I have been a “link” as long as I can remember. There was a time I didn’t want to do it. I was tired and scared to be the one to keep people talking to each other.  At one point my brothers were at odds with each other but a wise person told me, “remember, it said in the bible, a child shall lead them.” So, I started to accept my position as the “bridge” to bring people together.  Part of me still wanted to fight it. After all I’m not that special.  Yet, last summer I was still trying to make re connections with my cousins and Aunt on the paternal side of my family and I succeeded.    20151128_120606

I found my cousin, Vicki, living in Idaho, married and happy. Her brother, Scott, successful and married in NJ. My Aunt was suffering from dementia. I gave information and connected my brothers to our cousins again. My  cousin decided that since she was retired she had more time to take care of my Aunt in Idaho. My aunt loved the re-connection. She wrote to me and they even had a chocolate cake in my honor on my birthday. Pretty cool that 2000 miles away I could make her smile.  Sadly,  right after this Easter, Aunt Carolyn had a stroke and a week later she died. I was very upset. I tried calling but the connection was very bad. We are texting and emailing as much as we can.  God must have thought that since I did such a good job connecting my family, he would give me a larger challenge. Connecting strangers.


Even though the original orphanage in Raleigh, NC was started by the United Methodist Church, time and community needs have changed that part of the relationship. Now we are separated from the church itself because we work with state programs. However, it is the kindness of the members of the churches that keeps us going.

April 3rd,  I was invited by our volunteer who teaches art at my group home, to come to her church because the members had bought bibles for my youth! She wanted me there for the blessing and to thank the church for their involvement with MHFC. It was a very touching and fun service at Camden United Methodist Church.

See, I believe that God put me into these different positions to make more or deeper connections between the people and MHFC. I am a teacher for MHFC, a member of the Ahoskie United Methodist Church, and the United Methodist Women’s District officer for Membership and Nurturing.umw

The more people I talk to the more people find out about MHFC and all the different programs there are. We do serve 1500+ youth and their families. We are also adding new programs such as private adoption, an assessment center in Butner, NC, and one in Winston-Salem.

One kind act or word will change a life

It’s time for the people to make connections. Take a chance.  We need people to give their time, their hearts, their talents,  and their gifts. I work for God and am blessed enough to  get paid, monetarily and spiritually. I am even more blessed to work with people who  go through the volunteer paperwork and  come to our group home to work with our youth for no pay at all.  Our art teaching volunteer says that having the chance to do her favorite hobby with the youth and watching the growth of some youth is her paycheck.  The “paycheck” that God has is one that pays on Earth as it does in heaven. It is priceless and not bound by this world. Take a chance on something that will pay you the rest of your life. Make the connection and find out what you can do for MHFC.

(Click on the “Being Proactive” menu at top of page)

Faith is Love; Love is Having Faith

When I was living with my grandparents, the only safe school for this Protestant to attend in a 10 mile radius was a catholic school in South Orange. I was taught that God punished and gave and took etc… So I thought God took my mother away and made my father sick for some good reason.

Fast forward to a night when I had a night mare. I was probably around 13 I guess. I wondered down stairs and my uncle was up doing some paperwork or watching a movie or something.  All I remember is  that at some point I made a comment about how I understood why God took my Mom. My uncle looked at me in shock and said, “Is that what you think, that God took your mother?” I was a little taken back because I thought this man should understand, after all , he was brought up Catholic.  So, I said, “yes,” and he replied, “Melissa, your mother chose to drink. God cried with you when she died. He didn’t take her. He wanted her to make the right decisions but she couldn’t. God didn’t take her. God doesn’t take anybody. That’s why he gave us free will. ”

That made me change my view of God. I understood my mother’s death in a brand new way. I was finally able to get angry at the one who did take my mother away, my mother.  In fact I understood all bad things that happen in a new way. Man is born with an all uphill climb. Constantly fighting the easy way out, the wrong thing to do, the laziness, the greediness, the violence, etc…. Humans need to turn to their faith to fight all of this everyday of their lives and it’s our humanness that gets tired and stops and looks for excuses.  God told the devil to do what he will, the faithful will turn to God. He always loves us so us turning to him is saying that we love him.


So, When someone dies, when we watch the news, or when we get bad news from the doctor, It’s not God doing any of that. Things happen on Earth due to circumstances or do to man and God cries, laughs, suffers with us. Christian, Jewish, whatever you are, you need some type of faith to see you through the good and the bad.

If the only reason you don’t believe in God is because you blame him for all that is wrong on Earth, think again! It’s not him! It’s Man!  or it just happens. Our job is to seek a higher being for guidance on how to get through it. For me that is God. He has been with me through 38 years of  the good, the bad, and the “what the….” .  Faith is Love, and loving someone is saying you have faith in them.

I have more faith stories and experiences but I will save those for another day.